One of the motivations behind this blog was my own despair I experienced as a widow. The crushing silence, the words left unspoken, the aloneness at times was overwhelming . I was in an fortunate/unfortunate as a member of the mental health community, people assumed I had support. Unfortunately, I was hesitant to “burn out” too many friends by reaching out, and I eventually found a terrific local professional I could talk to. My other very smart move was to work with a life coach for over 2 years during my most challenging times.
I have received messages through this blog that describe the emotional despair many grieving people experience. Too often this grief is magnified and distorted because of the use of mind altering substances.
There are community resources available to you ! Reach out to your physician, spiritual advisor, Alcoholics Anonymous, Narcotics Anonymous, Women for Sobriety, Hospice…or call your local hot line.
You do NOT have to go through any of this alone !
REACH OUT LOCALLY and get the help you need.
(Your children have already survived an unbearable loss through the loss of a parent, they must not be subjected to the loss of a second parent!)
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
I wish it was easy to reach out locally…this deep sadness can only be understood by someone else that has experienced it, as a pretty quiet shy individual I find it difficult to reach out, especially now 362 days from his passing and NO ONE seems to miss him but me and a few of my immediate family…it is a very long lonely journey, easy to be a hermit and although I know he would want me to go on, it is more difficult than I ever imagined… no children and a new location to be near some of my familly…alone amidst 400,000…never dreamed my life would be this…
deb,
Oftentimes I wonder if people have really “forgotten” our lost loved one, or if they are afraid it they mention him we will suddenly remember our loss. As crazy as that sounds, I think some people actually do believe that talking about the loved one re-awakens our loss. (Crazy, for sure)
Thankfully because of the internet there are other sources of support which are available online which may be more comfortable for you at this time.
The support is crucial, however you get it. Taking time to be alone can be healing, but I know for me the isolation became toxic and my own despair became unsettling.
Feel free to reach out to me. I would be happy to problem solve this with you.
In the meantime, take care….there are many of us out there, honest.
Beth